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When somebody is telling us words that upset our inner dragons, our instinct is to defend ourselves, to fire back, and to teach this person a lesson - just as he/she expects.
Unfortunately this rarely works - this person is also facing his/her own inner dragons, and firing back will only fuel this downward spiral of cat-and-mouse game. A more fruitful (and difficult) way to deal with this situation would be to process our reaction so that we could surprise our critic and catch him/her off guard. We say "thank you" and get back to (our) work.
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Authors
Drs. Vidas Pinkevicius and Ausra Motuzaite-Pinkeviciene Organists of Vilnius University , creators of Secrets of Organ Playing. Don't have an organ at home? Download paper manuals and pedals, print them out, cut the white spaces, tape the sheets together and you'll be ready to practice anywhere where is a desk and floor. Make sure you have a higher chair. |
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